Even if things have been safe and healthy at your house, even if you do not even know anyone who has tested positive for Covid-19, the general levels of societal angst in the past year have affected all of us. And no matter how much you have done to shield your kids from the realities of the outside world, they have had a lot to deal with a lot of changes. It is no wonder that anxiety has been building up in them. Here are 8 tips for handling pandemic anxiety in your kids.
Read MoreIn a piece for the New York Times, Pooja Lakshmin opines, “if you’re a parent who’s at your wits’ end, instead of beating yourself up for your failure to self-care, try shortening your family to-do list and setting some boundaries." This is good advice, of course, but she doesn't give any concrete advice on how to shorten the family to-do list. I got thinking about that and came up with this list for parents of new to elementary school kids. (In the comment section below, tell me what are the things that you say no to.)
Read MoreSlow and Steady Wins the Race when it comes to overcoming anxieties and phobias. Too often it is hard for us to slow down and be empathetic with our children and their fears. And sometimes we are so afraid of upsetting them that we do everything we can to avoid the situation that triggers the fear. As with so many things, that answer lies in the middle. Help your child take baby steps towards mastering his fears. That way he will feel supported and seen and heard ; and at the same time you help him develop the skills and persistence he will need so much in life.
Read MoreLast week I wrote about how anxiety is affecting parenting by sharing the shift that I have seen in my 30 years of working with families. This week I want to outline what I think are some key buffers against parental and (by extension) kid anxiety. In light of the shootings this past week, it feels like I should be addressing the topic of how do you reassure children they are safe, but I still go back to my observation that the younger the child, the more the fears are the old ones that have always been there—being separated from one’s parent, fear of the dark and later fear of being made fun of. Addressing children’s fears is an important topic, but today I am going to stay focused on keeping your own parental anxieties at bay.
Read MoreAccording to the National Survey of Children’s Health, anxiety among children 6-17 is steadily on the rise. Data from 2011-2012 found that 1 in 20 US children has an anxiety diagnosis. That represents a statistically significant increase since the 2003 data; and one can only imagine that were the same data taken in 2018 that there would be a further increase. The numbers only go up with adulthood: 18.1% of the over 18 population every year is found to have an anxiety disorder (This includes anxiety diagnoses like OCD and social anxiety in addition to General Anxiety Disorders, making it the most common mental illness in the U.S.). Data on whether or not rates of anxiety have increased in general in the United States are inconclusive. But from my own experience, that was one of the main reasons I made a shift from teaching kids to supporting parents, and I think my experience sheds light on what is typical.
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